Forgiveness

I spoke to an "old friend" today. I put old friend in quotations because his actions demonstrated that I could no longer consider him a friend. He manipulated me in a particular situation and my younger, trusting self, did not see it while it was happening. The situation that he involved me in brought stress and mental distress into my life. In addition, it sapped me of all of my savings. The range of feelings that I've felt from that time to today has varied. There have been times where I feel angry, times where I feel extremely hurt, mad, and depressed. He knows how I feel and he has apologized countless times. Today, there was a shift for me. After speaking to him, I prayed and I ask God for a more compassionate heart. I also ask for continued strength to keep living life as I should. This person said that every time that something bad happens to him, he always wonders if it was because of what he did to me. Every time!  I don't want to be associated with what anyone believes to be negative karma. We all make mistakes. I know I have. Sometimes, we hurt people - albeit intentionally or unintentionally, but we have to recognize that we cannot change the past. We can, however, shape meaning out of our experiences and evolve into better human beings. Today, I ask God for a compassionate and forgiving heart. I've often heard that forgiving frees you, not the other person. Today, I choose freedom. I'm free and I've forgiven! I cannot forget because there was a sad wisdom that was obtained as a result of that experience. I, will, however discern what invitations to help are invitations for me to accept. Not all are. Today not only do I forgive but I pray that if I've hurt anyone unintentionally, they will forgive me.

Stay blessed and free yourself!!